Monday, April 22, 2013

Letter To Natalie

Dear Natalie,
My first born.  We get all of our firsts together.  That's pretty special you know.  And you are going through a very exciting time in your life right now.  I'm loving watching you make decisions for your future.  The next four years are going to be ultra important as you know.  Everyone keeps telling you that.

But there's something I don't think anyone has told you yet, not even me.  The next four years are important for us and our relationship.  We only have this short time together and we need to make it good and memorable.  Now don't get me wrong, I will still be telling you what to do.  You will not be getting away with anything.  But I will try my hardest to remember that time is fleeting and we have to make the most of it and have fun.

I need your help though.  I need you to come to me when you think I'm getting too distracted with everything else and you need me the most.  Sometimes other things can get in the way, but if you need time with just me let me know, we will schedule it.  Please be patient though.

I also want you to do something else.  I want you to stop being so afraid to try something new.  I want you to experience things.  I want you to go on dates with boys, to go to the park with your girlfriends, and to try new things.  This is the only time in your life you really get to throw caution to the wind.  Do it!  Don't look back and think; where did that time go?  You don't know if you like something until you try.  So get yourself out there and explore new things and have fun.  Don't worry so much about what other people do and think.  They aren't important.  You are!

That's the best advice I can give you at this time my beautiful girl.  You are already a huge success in my eyes.  Keep up the hard work.  The skies the limit for you.  I love you.  Thanks for giving me the gift of motherhood 14 years ago today.  Happy Birthday!


Happy 4 Year Due Date-iversary Angel Celeste Alia

Today marks 4 years since I was due with Celeste.  It's also of course Natalie's 14th birthday so you get two blog posts from me on here today.  Come back oh around 11:17 p.m. tonight to read Natalie's letter (I always schedule them for the time when they were born).

Normally I would write a letter to Celeste like the rest of the kids, but I'm going to do something a little different this year.  Back in December on Monica's Mom Musings I introduced Celeste to the world, but I never officially did it here.  So I want to give you all an opportunity to meet her.

Now I'm hesitant about doing this here because when I shared Celeste's story I had an anonymous commenter come and question the validity of Celeste's existence.  Accused me of playing things up for drama.  I almost shared her picture then, but the time wasn't right.  I wasn't going to be doing it for the right reasons.  It was simply going to be to prove a point to some anonymous person and I didn't need her validation if she didn't even have the courage to give me her real name.  So I kept it to myself for the most part.

I am in a good place now with my grief.  Not a day goes by that I do not think of Celeste and obviously some days more than others.  But the experience has taught me a lot and it has given me some truly wonderful friends along the way and shown me who my true friends are.  I came out with her picture because I realized that not sharing her like I do the rest of my children wasn't doing anything for her or my family.  People forget.  I don't want Celeste to be forgotten because she is so much a part of me.  To know her is to know me.  And to know her you have to see that she is real. 

She might be gone, but she is not forgotten.  So without further ado please say hello to my angel baby Celeste Alia.  Born sleeping on December 6, 2008.  Due date April 22, 2009.

Don't forget to come back later for Natalie's birthday letter.

Thursday, April 11, 2013

Happy 11th Birthday Kaitlyn

Dear Kaitlyn,
Boy oh boy, where do I start?  You're 11 years old!  It feels like just yesterday you joined our family, but here you are growing and changing and turning into this amazingly smart and independent young lady.

I know you are hesitant about going to this new school next year, but I really think you are going to love it.  I admire that you can give me a year to try it without much objection.  I know you will give it your all and I really can't wait to see what you will try out there.

You haven't shied away from a challenge yet so whatever you do, don't start now.  This is your time.  Your chance to try out new things that we could only dream of for you and you're going to do great and shine like the star that you are.

I am really looking forward to what this next year is going to bring for you and watch you really come into your own.  It has been an amazing 11 years with you and you are growing and maturing every day.  I can only imagine what the next 11 years will bring for you, but you know the skies the limit for you and no matter what you do or where you are you will be a success and you will be loved.

So happy birthday to you Katie Kittles.  I love you!